Saturday, October 31, 2009

What About the Strong Women?

After my previous post I had a bit of of feedback from people and almost everyone said something about women still being strong... as in they felt my previous post was lacking an explanation of where real strength comes from. Thus this post is a response to that.

When you have placed your trust in God you will stand stronger than those who are counting on their own will-power and the walls they have built around themselves to "protect" themselves.

The best way to explain this is to give another personal example.

Just a month ago my family was facing a bit of a mountain - we were getting our kitchen renovated. (Anyone who's been there will understand the pressure.) All the family was under extra pressure, some had assignments in before leaving the house for a week and a half, music exams were coming up... etc.

Some of the family were going to visit friends three hours away, and the few boys that needed stay in town were staying with Grandma. Everyone knew where they were going except for me. Because of my work situation I had no idea whether or not I needed to stay, and if I did stay, who with? Work messed me around, not giving me an answer until the last week, and well after they had said they would. I was also in the final stages of applying for a Bible college by correspondence.

With less than a week to go I found out that the course program had been changed, and if I wanted to enroll I would be two weeks behind. (Starting that day of course which couldn't happen!) The set up was completely different to what it was previously making it much harder. I went back and forth a bit. (Can I actually pull this off or is it just impossible/improbable?) I'm not someone to not try just because things look hard, and I knew I make it work, but at what cost? Particularly; what cost to my family? To make the decision harder different family members took sides as to whether they thought I should or shouldn't enroll in the course. (Talk about meat in the sandwich!)

After praying like mad and wishing for a lightning bolt from heaven which never came, I made a choice, and I knew from past experience that I would have to really firm on it, as I would be living with everyone's reactions to me not going with their idea for possibly months afterward. So I mentally prepared myself for the onslaught, determined that I was doing the best thing. - Not necessarily for me, but for a particular other family member who probably wouldn't cope with me studying from home like that. And when I made the choice something in me died.

Suddenly I went from knowing what was doing until I graduated (1-2 years) to being in total limbo. Anyone who has been in that place probably knows it's not pleasant. It's certainly not where I wanted to be.

So, I truly had to be unmoving and firmly convinced that this was where God had me next, therefore I had to trust Him completely and not waver. And trust Him I did.

At first almost everyone was telling me that I was mistaken, and trying to push me to change my mind. However, the day before I left to stay with friends for the two weeks (yes, God provided somewhere to stay), my mother said to me, "We're all falling apart and you're going on strong. I applaud you."

Now you have to understand a couple of things:

A) I was expecting the biggest opposition from my mum. This was a complete 180.
B) That was huge praise from her. She isn't liberal with her compliments.

So I felt a bit blown away. . .

Anyway, the only reason, I repeat; the ONLY reason I was able to be steadfast when everyone else was pulling their hair out was because I was trusting God. I wasn't passively trusting Him. I made a decision to trust Him regardless of circumstances and I didn't waver. That is how you are strong.

No comments: